(essay)

I’m going to be the part of 3 birthdays in 10 days. This way the March pushes my fantasy to flower. I’m writing it without romantic tender mood because I need my brain to manage the budget ideas and appearances for every individual party. And now I wanna jogging on all these points.

1. Budget

You will never think about money except the moment you don’t have it. The moment you need it more than oxygen but you still don’t have it. Why did I choose so essential element in our organism as oxygen? Because nobody understands our existence on a birthday party after you’ve came without present. The original plan of first two spring weeks had included 4 birthdays but destiny puzzle decided to joke on me because I was invited on 2 parties organized in one day. Of course I’ve chosen the more expensive one. I can explain it with invaluable goldness of this birthday person who bribed my heart many years ago. Unfortunately, these priceless relationships have its price. And don’t forget about other March-appeared brilliant people. As unemployed I caught a desire to cry. Then I realized I couldn’t cry with diamonds, so I put my tears back and asked my friend (who also got the same party plans as mine) for advice:

• Where should we sell a kidney?
• Maybe you wanted to ask what kidney should we sell? Your or mine?
• I feel both.

2. Ideas

• What do you want for your birthday?
• You shouldn’t bother about it. I’ll be pleased with money. That’s all.

“That’s all” means, “I expect the most grandiose surprise that will be the most favorite story for my grandchildren.” “That’s all” means, “I wait for this day only for your unbelievable congratulations that will make my heart stop, then go and then again stop after I will see your surprise twice.” “That’s all” means I have to make up happiness from dust in my head. And I transport only one head on my shoulders that must generate ideas for every birthday request. It’s like “Mind for the dull” from authors of “Health for the corpse”.

3. Appearances

• Why can’t you just take on your occasion outfit?
• Which one? What do you mean “which one”? Do girls have many occasion outfits?!
• Of course we do!
• So weirdo.

Ye, dear, so weirdo and unpractical! We can’t wear the same dress on “neighboring” parties. Why? Because we’ve worn it already! We have so much clothes exactly for “I have nothing to wear” and save different outfits for every time of year for any place of a party and for individual style of party initiator. This is why I enjoy my summer birthday when guests most probably will be naked. So what would I like to say in conclusion? Today I’m going to the first party. I’m sure it will be fantastically amazing. And I’m excited that my spring is beginning this way. I’m happy I have so many lovely people who want to share this beautiful moment with me. Oh God! I forgot about March 8 …