(essay)

This year has been too difficult. Although even before it started, I didn’t find it easy. I don’t want to remember the first half of the year at all with all these shocking war atrocities.

I was full of naive dreams that were never meant to come true. I thought things were going wrong because I wasn’t like that. And it really depressed me. I had a lot of bad thoughts then.

Later, I decided that this should not continue. I immersed myself in the study of psychology. This knowledge gave me a better idea not only about relationships between people, but also a better understanding of the state in which I lived and would live. Only the person himself or herself knows all the answers to the arising life questions; it is only necessary to ask them in time and remember all the events that bother you. Maybe we’re just missing something important in this contempo life full of dynamism and mundane trifles.

If other people don’t accept or appreciate me, then why do I need them? I realized that it wasn’t the number of friends that mattered to me, but their loyalty. There may not be many of them, but they can completely replace a hundred fake ones. I realized that I didn’t want to meet new people, because I was afraid that they would betray me too. Because in all of them, I look for real, sincere friends.

“That’s very nice,” I told myself. And really, what’s wrong with that? However, I should still be more sociable, because then how do I find new people? I noticed that I only made friends with those who came to me first. It`s time to change.

I keep believing. To believe that it will only get better from now on. We all have to pass the test of fate someday in order to become better in the end. So, I went through this. And it is important not to get bogged down in this, but to analyze your condition and come to conclusions. We all deserve to be happy. This difficult year forced me to come out of a warm bath and get down to the Earth. And finally I started living not in dreams, but in reality. I believe that in reality it is even much better.