(opinion article)

Emotions are a special type of mental processes or human states that manifest themselves in the experience of any significant situations (joy, fear, pleasure), phenomena, and events throughout life. Emotions act as the main regulators of mental life and arise in the process of almost any human activity. To learn how to manage your emotions, you can turn to the advice of Jill Hesson, a professional psychologist, for help. He is a personal development coach, author of popular books on self-development.

How to understand emotions

Any emotion consists of three aspects: thought, physical sensation, and behavior. We often think that emotions are positive or negative. But the belief that we should tune in to have only “positive” emotions, such as happiness, hope or sympathy, is hardly useful because we assume that it is better to avoid or suppress “negative” emotions: resentment, impatience, jealousy. In fact, all emotions have a positive purpose, although emotions such as fear, anger, sadness, or remorse may not be felt as pleasant. It is believed that there are six basic emotions: joy, surprise, fear, disgust, anger, sadness. All others come from them.

According to a study by Professor Albert Meyerabian, the expression of emotions and feelings consists of 7% of what is said in words, 38% in a voice, and 33% in body language. This means that 93% of what a person actually feels is transmitted non-verbally. And each of us has emotional triggers — specific situations that provoke reactions. Do you remember the term ‘the berserk button’? The trigger of rage? The worst examples of our behavior are often based on emotional triggers. If you do not recognize your emotional triggers, these negative actions may seem automatic and uncontrollable to you. Learning to recognize personal triggers of situations is the first step to changing your subconscious, automatic reactions.

How to manage emotions

First, have a confident body language. Because non-verbal communication often speaks more about our emotions than words. Our facial expressions, gestures, how we stand or sit, how fast and loud we talk, or how close we stand to others — all this sends strong signals about how and how we feel. Consciously or not, people make conclusions about our behavior and emotions. And even if we are silent, communication on our part does not stop, through our posture and facial expression. Therefore, a program to control your emotions should begin with an analysis of the language of your gestures and training to contain it.

Secondly, know how to act when triggers are turned on. For example, if you are very angry, learn to breathe deeply and properly. Hold your breath for five seconds (to “reload” your breath). Inhale slowly — after three seconds, and then exhale even slower — after five seconds. Consider the fact that it is exhalation that slows breathing. Continue to this rhythm, focusing on slow inhalation at the count of three and exhalation at the count of five for a minute.

Another option is to let everything out. Sing to loud music. Shout ‘AUUU’ in a forest or on a riverbank. Roll around where no one sees or hears you.

Do you know how to control your emotions? Or do you succumb to emotional outbursts? I expect your comments.