or potential family murder

(humorous essay)

Beginning. We had been living without watching TV for two months before my Mum and I got tired of each other. I was annoyed with Mum’s “Give me your tablet, please” and she got disappointed with my refusals. Thus, the best and the one man in our family decided to solve this problem. After a few hours of work and some minutes of bad language we were deprived of television for another two weeks.

The next step for our crime. Mum asked Dad to call a master if he could be at home and explain everything by himself. She repeated it two or three times. Then this woman was upset for two or three days (but I know she will remember that occasion for the rest of her life) because we met а master without Dad. The master left our home without seeing Dad too.

Our strokes. Firstly, my Mum and I, as clever women, had warned the master that we knew absolutely nothing. “Where are your wires? Why do you have only few outlets? What is this wire for?” WE DON’T KNOW, TV MAN. JUST DO YOUR WORK, OKAY? It was a severe battle without winners. Finally, the physical strength was used in our attempts to get a well-functional TV. It was figured out that we need to shove my closet to find some wires. It also turned out that we couldn’t move the furniture without something falling on master’s head. “YOU ALMOST KILLED ME,” he screamed. OF COURSE, WE TRIED TO KILL YOU BEFORE YOU HAD FIXED OUR TV. WE COULDN’T EVEN SEE OURSELVES ON NEWS FOR YOUR MURDER.

If we have some broken things for three or four times again, my Mum and I will become professional killers…