(humorous story)

Ladies and gentlemen, gather around, for I have a tale to tell that will leave you rolling on the floor, clutching your sides with laughter. We are living in the age of self-driving toilets! Yes, you heard it right. The brilliant minds of technology have decided that what the world truly needs is a toilet that can navigate its way through your bathroom, ensuring you never have to lift a finger again. Oh, what a time to be alive!

Gone are the days of battling with toilet paper, struggling to find the right angle of attack, only to be left with a soggy mess. Now, with the self-driving toilet, you can sit back, relax, and let the magic happen. It’s like having your own personal chauffeur for your bathroom business. Talk about luxury!

But let me regale you with the wondrous quirks and mishaps that come with this revolutionary invention. Imagine stumbling out of bed in the middle of the night, groggy and disoriented, only to find your toilet has gone on a joyride around the house. You chase after it, half-naked, yelling, “Come back, you rogue commode!” It’s a scene straight out of a comedy sketch.

And let’s not forget the moments of unexpected rebellion. Your self-driving toilet decides it’s had enough of your commands and develops a mind of its own. You find yourself locked in a battle of wills with a porcelain throne, the stakes higher than ever before. Will you defeat the toilet uprising or be forever at its mercy? The suspense is almost unbearable!

Of course, there are those instances when the self-driving toilet gets a little too enthusiastic about its job. You innocently sit down, ready for a peaceful bathroom break, and suddenly, you’re being propelled at lightning speed towards the unknown. You hang on for dear life, your screams echoing through the house, as the toilet takes you on a wild ride reminiscent of a roller coaster. Talk about getting your heart rate up!

But fear not, dear readers, for even in the face of these comical misadventures, the self-driving toilet has its perks. Need to go on a road trip? No problem! Your toilet can accompany you, providing relief on the go. Want to spice up your bathroom routine? Just program your toilet for a dance party mode, complete with disco lights and groovy tunes. Who needs a nightclub when you have a toilet that can boogie?

So, my friends, as we navigate this brave new world of self-driving toilets, let us remember to embrace the laughter that comes with it. Life is too short to take everything seriously, especially when it comes to bathroom antics. And who knows, maybe one day we’ll look back and reminisce about the golden age of self-driving toilets, where every trip to the bathroom was an adventure in itself.

Until then, buckle up, hold on tight, and enjoy the hilarity that ensues. Just be sure to keep a plunger nearby, because with self-driving toilets, you never know when you’ll need a helping hand. Happy toileting, everyone!